Starting Anew

Just like the earth waking after a long winter's slumber, so too do I feel that I am slowly waking back into awareness.  Trees in spring, slowly and subtly change from a gray/brown color to red to green buds, I am slowly, subtly bearing new fruit as I emerge into a new time in my life.  This new blog reflects my desire to continue growing and learning but also reflects my determination to continue to remain true to myself, following my path/passion while creating a small business which supports me. The sudden death of my partner in April necessitated this refocusing and readjusting.  I am only just now finding myself among the living again.

All of this, if one is being judgmental, by which I mean assigning good and bad tags to things in one's life, has been believe it or not, good.  Of course, I miss Jim very much but I must move forward.  I can hear him encouraging me to continue moving forward, to keep walking up the mountain following the trail. 

Just like when we would put on a pack and go out into the wilderness not sure of where we were going,  so too, our life journeys reflect the truth of the fact that we just must put one foot in front of another and follow the trail.  Sometimes the wind blows, the rain falls, you slip and get muddy, you hurt yourself in some way or another or lose the white blazes....our journey, my journey has mirrored a long hike.  When my life with Jim ended after 13.5 years, his trail ended but mine kept going.  So, I must follow or deny life it's opportunity to continue in me.  


What will this new blog, new venture, this VJ Hurst Creations become?  Not sure, I have taken a peek at my dreams but like all dreams you have to keep dreaming in order to figure out if the ending makes sense. I have a plan....to take each moment as it comes. A story I've told a lot during this healing time is about Jim's attitude towards life. He worked in customer service.  He never knew what was at the end of the next telephone call.  Could he handle it, solve their problem?  I believe he rarely doubted that he had the skills, brains, knowledge and network to do that.  He lived in the moment adjusting to what came at him right then. He didn't worry. 



Photo Credit: James Davis

I, on the other hand, have doubted my abilities all my life.  I've spent a lot of time looking around the corner to see how to avoid the big rock in the middle of the river, that I couldn't even see yet.  Usually, all of this worry resulted in me....hitting it.  So, I am snapping my What Would Jim Do? bracelet and living in the moment.  That resulted in a job reoccurring in May right when I needed it.  Other serendipitous things have happened all summer just when I needed them.  I kind of like this no-worry stuff. (ha, it takes a LOT of breathing to live this way)  However, it has born fruit and allowed me to understand the importance of non-judgment and acceptance.

So, here, I/we go...please follow me on this journey if you will ...I love & need the company and I am sure we will all learn a lot together.  Please, also,  visit my old blog at www.itsaverathing.blogspot.com for past history, stories and photos.  Thanks, see you up the trail.